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Personal Triumph

Healing beyond the mind: My AMP experience

I believe this wasn’t just a program — it was a retreat to reset the subconscious mind.
When we seek change in life, we must return to the root cause. Our mind works like an iceberg — most of its patterns lie hidden beneath the surface. The subconscious, conditioned since birth, silently governs much of what we experience. What manifests in the physical world first takes form at a subtle level within us.

Before attending AMP, I was already in a natural state of silence. My lifestyle is mostly inward — I spend much of my time in self-reflection. We often think we consciously choose change, but many shifts arise from the depths of the subconscious.

I don’t know to what extent AMP has touched those deeper layers within me, but something certainly moved. Two moments, in particular, shook me emotionally and spiritually.

The first was the sound of the flute played by Amit Bhaiya — yet it felt as if Krishna Himself was playing it, just for me. Every morning before i start my day at work i chant this affirmation  which is stuck on my laptop for few months now – “Like the sound of Your flute, let me dissolve into the rhythm of Your devotion.” I always used to wonder why He never played the flute for me — but now I realize, this experience was not random. I call it a spiritual blessing; others may call it mystical — both are true in their own way.

The second was healing. I began my journey carrying a deep physical sickness (fever and allergic cough), one I consciously hid from my family, knowing they wouldn’t have let me travel otherwise. Yet after the sessions, a quiet calm replaced the suffering — as if I left all my pain behind in AMP.

The third was one of the processes where we cleansed the emotions stored in the meridians. It made me feel completely empty — inside out — as though something heavy was leaving my system.


Throughout the session, Divine spoke — not through words alone, but through silence, energy, and inner clarity. The direction and answers to countless questions came so naturally that it felt as if the Lord Himself had come down in human form to converse with me.

Could anyone ask for more?
These are only a few reflections at the physical level. What unfolds ahead in my life will reveal the deeper, subtle shifts that have taken root within.
The morning after returning, I woke up with a quiet feeling — “Why am I here?” — yet I chose to simply sit in silence. That silence now feels effortless, peaceful, and full of grace.

As a Mudra Therapist, I’ve been sincerely practicing the Life Changing Mudra and Therapeutic Mudra for nearly two and a half years now — they have been a constant source of balance and transformation in my journey. AMP, in its own divine way, felt like a continuation and deepening of that same inner work — as if both were guided by the same Higher Hand.

My deepest gratitude to my Guru, Divine and Amit Bhaiya.
I hold profound respect in my heart for you bhaiya — words fall short of expressing it. I bow down to your lotus feet. Jai Gurudev!

If the Lord wills, He will write Part 2 of this journey. For now, I rest in gratitude — and I know I will return for another AMP in a few months, to continue this beautiful inner unfolding.

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Healing and Spirituality Personal Triumph

From the Curve of C to the Circle of Life

I’d been deliberately chasing my purpose when, unexpectedly, a childhood moment of pure awareness came rushing back. I must have been about three years old. Until then, I remember almost nothing — as if my awareness was still asleep. One day, while learning my letters, I wrote the letter C. First correctly, then incorrectly. My mother corrected me with a slap.

It was the first and the last time she ever raised her hand at me.

For me, as a little child, it wasn’t pain that stayed — it was the sudden shock, the imprint. That shock startled me awake; it became the first clear memory etched in my life.

Sometimes awareness begins not in understanding, but in surprise.

Looking back now, I see it wasn’t just about a letter. It was a spiritual initiation, a signal that my soul’s journey had begun.

Every beginning hides itself in an ordinary moment.

The C itself holds a deeper meaning. It is a semi-circle, incomplete. That curve became a symbol of longing, of incompleteness, and of the search for wholeness. What looks incomplete may be pointing us toward wholeness.

For years, I looked outward for the missing half, believing that only someone else could turn my “C” into a circle.

This longing for meaning is not new. Across time, seekers have found depth even in the simplest of things. It reminds me of Arjuna’s story:

It is said that Lord Krishna once gave Arjuna a set of precious gemstones. For Arjuna, anything that came from his Lord was divine. So he held the gems with reverence and began to reflect. Each stone, he thought, must symbolize a truth of life, a hidden lesson.

When he shared his interpretations, Krishna burst into laughter. With his playful smile, He said: “Arjuna, I only gave you gemstones. I never meant them to carry such depth. But you — with your sincerity — have drawn out meanings even I did not place there.”

Meaning is not always in what is given, but in how we choose to receive it.

In the same way, my childhood “C” — a moment of correction, a moment of awakening — became a lifelong gem. What was only a letter turned into a spiritual mirror, teaching me. Wholeness does not come from another. Completion is discovered within.

When we connect with the universal energy, we become a full circle in ourselves. And only then can we meet another — not from lack, but from fullness.

The earliest wound may be a hidden key; what once broke us open might have been the very curve guiding us toward our circle of wholeness.

The circle was never missing — it was waiting to be drawn from within.

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Healing and Spirituality Personal Triumph

In the Embrace of Blessings

In the sacred observance of my mother’s Pitrpaksa ritual, I bowed to the Brahmin’s feet, not with hands but by placing my forehead upon them.

As her hands moved over me to bless, I felt something beyond the ordinary. It was as if my mother herself was caressing me – a warmth, a love, a presence filled every fibre of my being. My body trembled with the vibration of that touch, a connection so deep that words cannot capture it. In that moment, I realized that love transcends form, touch, and time.

Previously, during the Shraadh, as I served food and applied a tilak with red sacred powder, my hand trembled. The gentle touch of my ring finger carried a vibration—a subtle current that spread through me.  In that sacred instant, I felt her presence merge with mine, transcending mourning, joy, and every other emotion. It was rapture, as if my soul dissolved in her presence

Sometimes devotion is not in action but in surrender — in feeling, receiving, and recognizing the unseen energy of those who came before us.

The heart remembers what the mind can’t explain. The soul recognizes what the eyes can’t see.  Bodily emotions cannot fully convey the essence of feelings.

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Personal Triumph

Anandam 2.0 – A Miss Beyond Words

Missing Anandam 2.0 feels like a wound beyond words. Yesterday, I was deeply engaged in austerities at home — hosting guests, fulfilling duties, and keeping my mind steady. And yet, even amidst all of that, a part of me was constantly mindful of what was unfolding in Pune. At a subtle level, I was connecting with the Panchatattva, almost as though my spirit was there in Nandu Hall while my body remained here.

This morning, when I woke up to the glimpses of videos and images shared by a dear friend, and when a few therapists reached out saying they missed my presence, emotions surged within me. My teacher and a few senior therapists too had asked me to come, and when they learned the reason for my absence, they understood the pain I carried within. That acknowledgment itself felt like a blessing — as though my longing and sincerity were also a tribute to my study, a silent offering in their own way.

Still, a question lingers within — what mistake did I make that I couldn’t attend this gathering? Did I not put in the honest efforts these past two years? Was I selfish somewhere that the five elements withheld their grace? These thoughts keep arising, pricking my heart with a quiet ache.

And yet, life weaves its own design. Coincidentally, we have a family function today — another form of austerity through kirtan. Perhaps this too is divine arrangement. Somewhere, the Lord and the Panchatattva are blessing me in ways unseen, preparing me to step into another dimension in my journey, at a more subtle and inward level.

Even from afar, Anandam 2.0 stirred something in me. Just thinking of the energy that must have filled Nandu Hall makes my heart throb with both sadness and reverence. Perhaps this longing itself is my offering, my invisible bridge to what I missed.

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Eternal Love: A Mother's Legacy

A Daughter’s Farewell – Heart, Love, Soul, and Devotion

A few months before her departure, during a conversation about death, she had told me something profound. She said that if one writes Ram with sandalwood 108 times on the body after death, the soul attains moksha and reaches Baikunth Lok. She shared that people in olden times believed and practiced this, but in today’s world, no one has the time or devotion to do it anymore. Her words etched themselves into my heart without me knowing why. I did not utter anything to her then but I made up my mind quite do that when time comes. But I had no hint that it would come so soon then.

Despite her critical illness, I prayed with every breath, but destiny had already written a different script. When I saw her body in the ICU, I couldn’t believe she was no longer there. For the first time in my life, I stood so close to death. It felt as if the ground beneath me collapsed, and my whole universe crumpled into pieces. In that moment, it felt as though the Lord had taken away my very reason for living in this realm. Also, it didn’t feel like a body—it felt like the remnant of a soul, her divinity—like a calm, an aura, or a sense of stillness.

I remembered her words and thought of arranging sandalwood to write Ram 108 times on her body. But my emotions, my love, and my devotion could not wait for hours. Instead of waiting for hours for her body to be discharged by the hospital, I longed to write with the depth of my soul—the purity of love I held for her—using the very fingers she once held, with the same love with which she had nurtured me. So, with trembling hands, I wrote Ram 108 times on her body—each stroke filled with love, prayers, and devotion, even as my heart shattered into pieces. Every ‘Ram’ was a prayer, every stroke a tear, every letter a surrender.

I stood firm, determined to perform all her rituals—even those traditionally reserved for a son in Hindu tradition—and my family, too, agreed, recognizing the depth of my love for her. In their acceptance, I felt the world acknowledging my bond and devotion towards her.

Later in the afternoon, while we were waiting for the insurance formalities to be cleared so we could take her body for the rituals, I got my cycle. I never believed in this tradition—in fact, I have always seen the cycle as purely biological. But for my Mumma’s upliftment and for her soul to rest in peace, I did not want to become an obstacle from the perspective of tradition.

Her body was fragile, covered with wounds and water was oozing out from her skin. Even in that fragile, wounded body, I saw the strength with which she had lived and loved. The hospital authorities did bandage most her body before releasing. I had witnessed her suffering so closely, but most people must have lost their senses—it was unbearable to see her in such a terrible condition.

As per Hindu tradition, I was not allowed to perform the ceremony, and in that moment, I realized something deeper: the Lord and my Mumma had already accepted my pure devotion and love.

In that moment, I knew, irrespective of my cycle, it was impossible to write with sandalwood on her body and with certainty: what I had done earlier—writing Ram 108 times with my own fingers, with love and prayer was accepted and truest of rituals already performed through these hands.

In that truth, I found peace—knowing the Lord and my Mumma had already accepted my devotion, that her soul had reached where it was meant to be, and that our bond would remain unbroken for eternity.

With every breath, I know—I’m on my way to the eternal Home, where Mumma waits, and love lives forever.

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Eternal Love: A Mother's Legacy Krishna's Devotee!!! Personal Triumph

The Last Scene I Wish to Carry in My Heart

As I journey deeper into awareness, I realize one eternal truth — everything in this world is an illusion. All relationships are fleeting shadows. Yet, amidst this great illusion, there is one bond in human form that shines with unmatched love and light, guiding us unfailingly towards the Divine — the bond with Mother.

Even the father’s love is profound, but it is the mother’s embrace, her sacrifices, her unconditional grace that is supreme. In her, I see the living altar of divinity.

Before I leave this world — before I transcend this illusion — the last scene I wish to hold in my heart is this:

My mother as Anjani Mata, myself as Hanuman Ji, and before her stands Lord Ram. As per the sacred katha, Lord Ram, the very embodiment of dharma, bows before Anjani Mata with folded hands and says:

“Dhanya, dhanya ho Anjani Mata,
jinhone aise Lal ko janm diya.”

Blessed indeed is Anjani Mata, who gave birth to such a son.

For me, Krishna is everything — the all-pervading presence. But in my heart, when I live this scene, I see Him not just as the Creator, but as the Lord of love, the eternal guide of the soul. In that divine vision, the Lord Himself bows at my mother’s lotus feet, honoring her love, her sacrifices, and her nurturing presence that shaped me into who I am.

Sometimes, I even meditate on this very scene — as if rehearsing my final moment as a human. Each time, it draws me into a transcendent state, where tears of gratitude and devotion flow. In that stillness, I feel an immense motivation: to be good, to do good, and to live in service.

And so, in my final breath, I pray that the last image I carry is of this divine scene:

My mother, radiant as Anjani Mata.

Myself, ever her Hanuman, forever in her service.

And the Lord Himself — as Krishna, the Creator — bowing in reverence at her lotus feet.

For in truth, to be born of such a mother is itself God’s greatest blessing.
And the feet of the mother will forever remain the first temple where Divinity dwells.

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Personal Triumph

The Circle of Love and Light

Teachers are not always the ones we meet in classrooms. They appear in many forms—sometimes as parents, mentors, friends, or even as life itself. Each of them shapes us in their unique way, leaving behind imprints that guide our journey. Today, I feel deeply grateful as I write about the teachers and guides who have made me who I am.

The Guiding Light of My Life

My mother was my very first teacher, and her lessons began even before I was born. From the time I was in her womb, she nurtured me not just physically but at a subtle, spiritual level. She was the one who taught me my alphabets, and I still remember the one and only time she ever slapped me—when I wrote the letter “C” incorrectly after doing it correctly before.

But she was more than just a mother. She was my friend, my sibling, my companion who played with me after school, as my timing with my elder sisters often differed. She instilled discipline in me from a young age and emphasized the importance of independence. At the same time, she pampered me with love, care, and little joys that made my childhood so special.

Her contribution to my life cannot be measured in words—her sacrifices, her strength, and even the pain she endured shaped me into who I am today.

For me, she was not just my mother; she was, and will always remain, my Guru, my Krishna. Before I bow to any divine form, I bow to her—for the values she inculcated in me continue to serve as my eternal guide.

My Dad and Sisters

Alongside my mother, my father and sisters have also been my teachers. Their love and pampering added warmth to my journey, making me feel cared for and supported at every step. Being the youngest in the family, I often received the privileges of their sacrifices—things I did not notice as a child. It is only after growing up that I truly realized how much they gave up so that I could have a better life.

My family has been my strength, silently shaping me with their love, care, and values. Whatever I am today is not just because of me, but because of them. We have always moved together as a team, and my roots, my security, and my courage come from the foundation they built for me.

Abha Miss – My Maths Teacher

Abha Miss was my mathematics teacher both at school and in tuition, but my bond with her extended far beyond academics. Her presence, support, and guidance have played a beautiful role in my journey. I will always remain grateful for the impact she had on my life.

Nisha Mam – My Spiritual Guide

After losing my mother, I crossed paths with Nisha Mam—a teacher who entered my life almost as if she had been sent by my mother herself. Her presence, her wisdom, and her way of guiding have been significant in my journey. She doesn’t provide ready-made answers; instead, she lights the path and allows me to walk it with awareness. Her presence itself is a guiding force that I often refer back to in moments of reflection.

Tony – My Mentor at Work

In my professional journey, I have been fortunate to have Tony, a senior mentor whose role has been pivotal in shaping me. He has always believed in my potential, yet never handed me solutions directly. Instead, he challenges me with direction, trusts me to put in the effort, and helps me discover my own way forward. His faith has instilled confidence in me, and his mentorship has been a true blessing

Nikhil – My Fitness Coach

And then there is Nikhil, my fitness coach, who taught me that fitness is more about mindset than just the body. On days when I dragged myself, he pushed me beyond limits, entertained even my smallest doubts, and supported me with patience. What inspires me most is his toughness and inner strength—it reflects in the way he trains and motivates. Through him, I have learned that resilience of the mind can truly transform the body, and that with the right mindset, I can do it.

The Silent Teachers – Critics and Heartbreaks

Not all teachers enter our lives with affection. Some come in the form of critics, disappointments, and heartbreaks. At the time, their presence may feel harsh, but in hindsight, they too were vital teachers. They pushed me out of my comfort zone, tested my resilience, and forced me to widen my boundaries.

The pain they caused became the fire that shaped my strength. Their criticism made me introspect, and their absence made me value presence. In their own way, they taught me lessons no book could ever offer: to rise after falling, to trust my own worth, and to keep growing even when it hurts.

A Bow of Gratitude

Each of these people—whether they brought me love, guidance, challenges, or even heartbreak—have been my teachers. Some entered through birth, some through circumstance, and some by sheer divine blessing. To all of them, I bow with gratitude. They remind me that life is a continuous journey of learning, and teachers are the guiding stars who help us shine.

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Healing and Spirituality Personal Triumph

Guided by Grace – My Artistic Ode to Love & Light

This painting emerged from a deep, meditative and spiritual experience —a gesture of wisdom and unity. It reflects the soul’s journey in this realm, moving from the gross to the subtle, from the material to the spiritual, returning to the realm where we truly belong.

It is a movement from darkness to love and light—the eternal reality as I have come to understand it. The planet in the painting may be seen as Earth, our present home, or perhaps Mars, my birth number, symbolizing a personal link to cosmic origins.

The direction of this journey is guided by my Guru, who leads me toward inner upliftment and truth. The path moves toward the sun—yet, in my vision, it stretches beyond, into the multiverse, the source from which the Milky Way itself was born, as echoed in the Big Bang.

While much of the emotion behind this work transcends words, it is my humble attempt to depict a soul’s flight toward its highest light.

In essence, this painting is my inner reflection cast into the outer world—a world of love and light, illuminated by the grace of my beloved Lord Krishna.

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Personal Triumph

A Journey Back to Her Embrace

Some journeys change something deep inside you—without warning, without effort. My recent trip to Sikkim was one such journey.

As I was approaching my destination, something unexpected caught my attention. On the way, I saw a monkey gently cradling its baby, much like how a kangaroo holds its little one in her pouch. That tender moment struck me deeply—it reminded me of my mother’s love. The kind of love that stays with you, even in silence. That one scene held more warmth and emotion than words can express.

Soon after, just as I was about to reach the hotel, I looked up—and there it was: a sunset over the Himalayan mountains. Golden hues spilling over snow-kissed peaks, stillness all around, and in that moment… something within me shifted. My heart felt full. Tears began to roll down my cheeks without any explanation. It was overwhelming, humbling, and deeply moving. I whispered to myself, this is where I belong. I would give up everything for this stillness—for this feeling of home.

A Moment Beyond Words

Honestly, what I’ve written here might be just 0.1% of what I truly felt. No words could fully contain what I experienced. Sometimes I wonder if I’ll ever be able to fully express it—and I’ve made peace with that. Because I know I’m blessed to have lived it.

And maybe… some things are meant to be felt, not described.

The Real Journey

This wasn’t a trip I planned for leisure—it was a break I desperately needed. For the longest time, I had been yearning to escape.
From my home.
From people.
From responsibilities.
From everything.

It felt like I had been carrying too much for too long—and I just wanted to run.

But the haunting didn’t stop with the change of place. The thoughts, the people, the pain… they followed me. And then, somewhere between those winding roads and quiet moments, I realized: I wasn’t running from them—I was running from myself.

That realization changed everything.

The Himalayas didn’t just offer peace; they mirrored my chaos. And in their vast silence, I began to hear myself again. That moment of deep emotional release, standing before the mountains, was more than just awe—it was cleansing. A beginning. A homecoming.

It felt like Mother Nature held me the way my mother once did—with quiet strength and unconditional love.

The stillness around me somehow reached the noise inside me. And then, emotion welled up in my eyes—quiet, unstoppable, and deep.

In that moment, I remembered something I hadn’t felt for long.

Whenever life overwhelmed me, I would quietly place my head in my mother’s lap.
No words were spoken. Just her hand gently stroking my hair.
Tears would flow… and in that silence, I always felt—

This is the safest, purest, and most peaceful place in the UniverseI felt my higher self. I felt grounded, I felt whole. I felt a deep sense of belonging, warmth, and divine love.

That day in the Himalayas… it felt just like that.
Like I was once again resting in her lap.
It wasn’t just the mountains. It was Mother Nature. It was my mother.
It was something beyond words—like the universe held me in the very same way she once did.

And for the first time in a long time…
I wasn’t alone.

Categories
Healing and Spirituality

Finding Divinity Within

🌸 A couple of days ago, I returned from Jagannath Puri—a place I had longed to visit ever since my mother’s soul departed from the hospital that had this sacred temple of Lord Jagannath within its premises. I used to wait there, seeking solace, as I visited her and consulted with the doctors.

Despite my deep desire, I couldn’t find the connection between my visit and the message I sought. The air carried purity, and the atmosphere offered peace, yet the experience felt like a riddle I couldn’t solve. 🤔✨

Why this urge to visit?
What was the mystery behind it?
Why did every step feel like a hurdle, and yet, why was I so drawn to it?

💫 Today, during morning meditation, a profound truth unfolded before me:

Moko Kahan Dhundhere Bande
Mein To Tere Paas Mein
Na Teerath Mein, Na Moorat Mein
Na Ekant Niwas Mein
Na Mandir Mein, Na Masjid Mein
Na Kabe Kailas Mein
Main To Tere Paas Mein

The divine has always been with me—not in the physical spaces I sought but within me. 🌟

For so long, I was blind, unable to see the light within because I believed myself impure, unworthy of holding the divine presence. But today, I was guided to embrace a truth I had long hesitated to accept:

The divine resides within me, as it does in all of us. 🙏✨

The peace I felt in Puri wasn’t external—it was the divine’s gentle reminder to look inward. 💖 And when I did, I realized that my mother, whom I have always considered divine, was my guiding light to this realization. Through her, I found a connection to her essence and something far greater—the infinite presence of the divine within. 🕉

The journey to divinity is not one of distance but one of realization.

With a heart full of gratitude, I bow to my Guru and the divine Lord for blessing me with such a profound realization and for gifting me this beautiful start to the new year. 🌸🙏

May we all awaken to the light within us and carry it forward into every moment of the year ahead. ✨💫

What about you? Have you ever experienced a moment where the divine revealed itself within you? Share your story below—I’d love to hear it! 🌸